Can I get a do-over?

Undo. Undo! UNDO!!!

What a crappy way to spend a night. How crappy was it? I fell asleep. While he was still inside me.

Yeah...

I woke up to a note stuck into the bathroom mirror with his telephone number on it. Uh... you're kidding, right? I absentmindedly tossed it in the trash. Never again, man. Never again.

This one doesn't count.

On the plus side, it's one whole week until the cum-slutting dirty skank of a neighborwhore moves out. I, for one, cannot fucking wait. Goodbye, nasty smoke wafting through my windows (do you dip your smokes in formaldehyde, you vapid cunt?). Goodbye, personal conversations at top volume on the balcony (so, how's that oozing herpes sore you found on your vagina, bitch?). Goodbye, misbehaving bastard child (please don't breed; the last thing the world needs besides another bullshit Bush war is you polluting the gene pool). And goodfuckingbye, Li'l Miss "I'm so needy and hungry for validation that I act like my vagina has a coin slot and turnstile". Good fucking riddance. Don't darken my neighborhood again, you rotten cooze.

Not that I hate her, or anything.