The rational middle ground between self-denial and self-indulgence.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Commonalities

Why is it that 9 out of 10ª of the women with whom I went to college were named one (or more) of the following:
  • Melissa / Melyssa* / Mellisa*
  • Michelle
  • Lisa
  • Emily / Emilie
  • Brittany / Britney / Britni / Brittni*
  • Lindsay / Lindsey / Lindsi
  • Courtney / Kourtney / Kortney
  • Katherine / Katie / Kathy / Kate / Katharine / Kat / Catherine / Cathy / Catie / Cate / Cat
  • Rachel / Rachael / Rachelle
  • Kelly / Kellie / Kelli
  • Heather
  • Jessica
  • Jennifer / Ginnifer
  • Sarah / Sara
  • Mary / Maria
  • Megan / Meaghan / Meghan
  • Elizabeth / Beth / Libby / Liz / Lizzie / Edy / Edie
  • Danielle / Daniella / Danyell* / Danyel / Daniela
  • Nicole / Nicola / Nicky / Nikki / Nicki / Nicci* / Nic / Nik
  • Hillary / Hilary / Hyllari*
  • Alison / Allison / Alyson
  • Julia / Julie
  • Brianna / Brianne / BreAnna / Breanne / BreeAn*
  • Alexandra / Alex / Lexi / Alexa
  • Melanie / Melany
  • Caroline / Carolyn / Karolyn*
  • Stephanie / Stefani*
  • Ashley / Ashlee / Ashleigh
  • Erica / Erika
  • Joanne / Joanna / JoAnn / JoAnne / JoAnna / Joana
...and every other new baby girl (and boy, and sprog of indeterminate gender) is named either Ja(y)den or Jordan?

[ª Statistic pulled arbitrarily from my ass, but you get the point; the frequency was noticeably high]
[* I Shit Thee Not!]

Don't even get me started on the frequency of boys' names like Steve, Joe, Brian, Matt, Dan, Adam, Tom, Richard, John, David and-- heaven forbid-- Mike.

It makes you almost wish for a LeBron or a Marisleysis, just to break up the repetition.

9 Comments:

Blogger Darwin said...

I know of a brat named Jayden - a family friend's granddaughter. Spoilt whiny little thing badly in need of a good kick up the arse.

9/18/07 11:37 PM

 
Blogger Pisser said...

I can vouch for that, having known a Cortney AND a Meegan. Oh, and Cortney gets irrationally pissed off if you leave in the silent u.

Why they think we should know this is beyond me. I'm gonna name mine all Bob.

9/19/07 10:47 PM

 
Blogger labyrinthine said...

oh, I had a good one the other day. as you (may or may not) know, I do typesetting for a printing company. one lady's wording for a baby shower invitation listed the honoree as "Walker". I was like "..........." and let her know that etiquette states that a baby shower honors the mother-to-be and not the baby, so I suggested she change her wording. she then let me know that Walker *was* the mother-to-be. ...the fuck?

and as you can see, I'm a Sarah. I was *almost* called Brianna though. my friends find this funny, because if you know anything about me, you know I am NOT a Brianna.

9/20/07 3:38 AM

 
Blogger labyrinthine said...

oh oh, AND. one of my coworkers has kids called Madis0n, L0gan (a GIRL, btw), and C0urtland. (killing the Os for searchability...). and a guy I had a thing for in high school now has kids with names containing "Montana" and "Dakota".

9/20/07 3:40 AM

 
Blogger Mockingbirdflyaway said...

Some of the names that people are coming up with (or merely changing the spellings thereof) are getting too strange for me.

I think I'm going to stick to the old classics. Eleanor, Nicholas, Margaret, Alexander... etc.

It's be a nice offset to my own slightly offthewall name - Janna. (Psst. Not Jenna. I am not a Jenna and I want to shoot most of the Jenna's I meet.) :P

9/20/07 6:55 PM

 
Blogger Avatar said...

Darwin: Jadens suck. That's my unfounded stereotype, and I'm sticking to it.

Pisser: Bob, Bobbina, Bobette, and Bob Jr.?

Labyrinthine: A grown woman named Walker? The hell...?

Mockingbirdflyaway: I actually really like those names, too. The ones that end in "I" or "EE", especially following repeated consonants really irk me.

9/20/07 10:13 PM

 
Blogger labyrinthine said...

I set up an order for a birthday party for a "Preslee" yesterday.

okay, this has gotten way out of hand!

9/21/07 3:26 AM

 
Blogger Bent Fabric said...

I would gladly accept one of those instead of one of these.

9/23/07 1:03 PM

 
Blogger Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Is it sad that my 3 best friends' names all appear on that list? I gotta stop making friends with white people.

My name is not on that list. Americans hate the French, clearly.

Though I was almost named Gwendolyn...thank god I wasn't.

9/24/07 9:44 PM

 

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